How to Create a Happy Life While Managing a Serious Illness

When we are healthy, we often take our good health and our ease of getting through the day for granted.  We don’t give a lot of thought to our bodies, and we just go blithely through life.  But when we are faced with a serious illness, life becomes more complicated.  As a result, when we are managing an illness, we have to be more intentional about how we spend our days in order to create a happy life.

Being intentional simply means choosing how you are going to spend your time.  And it means choosing how you are going to handle whatever life throws your way.  In fact, we should all be trying to live intentionally, whether or not we are facing an illness.

Normally, most of us live life in a reactive mode.  We work hard, handle emergencies as they arise, and react to problems quickly, from an emotional state.  But intentional living requires use to pause.  When we pause, we stop and decide what we want to do with this day that we’ve been given.  And when we pause, we also stop and consider how to respond to problems with wisdom.

So, in order to create a happy life while managing a serious illness, we have to stop living life on auto-pilot.  Instead, we need to start being more intentional about how we live each day.  Below are ways to do just that.

Be Knowledgeable About Your Condition

Over the years, I’ve observed people react differently to illness.  My mother, who passed away recently, decided not to accept her illness.  She just decided that it wasn’t happening.  By contrast, I’ve known others who accepted their diagnosis and tried to become as knowledgeable as possible about their condition.

If you want to create a happy life while managing an illness, you’ll be happier if you empower yourself with knowledge.  Learn as much as possible about your condition and do whatever you can to take care of your body. 

For example, I don’t go to the doctor without knowing as much or more than the doctor does about my physical condition.  I do my research in advance of any appointment.  Then, when I meet with the doctor, he or she will give me their opinion, but the doctor will never provide me with new information.  At best, the doctor simply confirms my own research and conclusions.

The reality is that no one is going to care about your health as much as you do.  So, don’t merely rely on your doctor, to care for your health.  Your physician can prescribe medications and do procedures, and certainly that is helpful.  But you need to do everything that you can to become an expert on your body and its care.

Realize that it’s empowering to become the expert of your own body.  Being at the mercy of a physician to understand your health doesn’t feel great.  But it does feel great to be The Expert of You. 

So, if you want to create a happy life when dealing with an illness, step one is to become knowledgeable about your body and your condition.  Become an expert in YOU, and empower yourself by being completely knowledgeable about your health.

Make Self-Care Your Top Priority

Self-care is important no matter what your health condition is.  Unfortunately, we often let self-care go by the wayside when we are healthy.   So, we may forgo exercising or a proper diet when life becomes too busy.  But when our bodies are dealing with an illness, self-care needs to become our top priority.

To become adept at self-care, consider looking at your body from the view of benevolent outsider.  Ask yourself, “How should I care for my body today?  Does my skin need a special kind of lotion or sunscreen?  Would my digestion benefit from a dinner of beans and vegetables?  Does my body need 30 minutes this afternoon to rest?” 

You might take your inquiry a step further and ask yourself, “How can I pamper my body today?  Are there pleasant-smelling creams I could apply to my skin?  Perhaps I might benefit from sitting on the couch to rest and sip an aromatic cup of tea.” 

When we have a physical illness, it’s important to find ways to treat our bodies gently and with kindness.  So, to create a happy life in the midst of an illness, pay close attention to your body, what it needs, and how you can pamper it. 

Do Something Creative Every Day

Some people mistakenly think that only certain people in this world are creative.  However, nothing could be further from the truth.  As human beings, we are all creative.  The human brain naturally desires to create things.  And creativity is nothing more than making something pleasing or interesting where nothing previously existed.

Realize that if you write a poem, you’ve created beautiful words where there once was a blank page.  If you prepare a dish or a batch of cookies, you’ve created something delicious to eat where there once was a pile of ingredients.  And if you play a piece of music on the piano, you’ve created beautiful sounds where there once was silence. 

The key is to being happy is to do something creative each day.  Our brains need to create, and our souls need the satisfaction of enjoying our creation. 

Admittedly, when life is busy, our creative pursuits often can go by the wayside.  But when dealing with an illness, it’s important that we spend our time in ways that satisfy our souls.  And a very satisfying way to spend your time is to engage in creative endeavors.

Don’t worry if you aren’t immediately good at something creative.  No one starts out being a great knitter, an exceptional painter or a superb cook.  Creativity is about practice.  But even practicing a creative pursuit is enjoyable. 

So, as you are working to create a happy life while managing an illness, don’t forget to prioritize doing something creative each day.  Your brain and your soul will thank you!

Develop a Gratitude Practice

I will concede that when life is hard, it’s challenging to be grateful.  But a mindset of gratitude will change how you experience your day.  It can change your perspective from “My life is crummy,” to “I am truly blessed.”

I have a friend who says that when he feels frustrated, he tries to look at the tasks before him in terms of “I get to” rather than “I have to.”  There is a lot of wisdom to that perspective on life.  Frankly, you can apply that point of view to everything from cooking dinner to cleaning your bathroom.

So, when dealing with a serious illness, we might say to ourselves, “Ugh.  I have to go to the doctor again this week.”  But if you think about all the people in poorer countries who don’t have proper healthcare, it becomes clear that being able to go to the doctor is a privilege.  And then your perspective becomes, “I get to go to the doctor.”

Gratitude changes our perspective in many ways.  It’s easy to look at other people and say, “Their lives are so easy.  Why is mine so hard?”  A gratitude practice puts an end to that Comparison Game.  Instead, by being grateful, we focus on the blessings that we have, whether that blessing is a kind family member, a pet or a good friend.  A blessing simply may be a safe place to live or healthy food to eat.

Even in the midst of illness, there are things to be grateful for.  And there are people to be grateful for.  So, yet another way to create a happy life is to be sure to be grateful for whatever is good in your life.

Laugh and Keep Your Mood Light

Part of successfully managing any stressful period in life is to keep your mood light.  It’s easy to fall into the doldrums when facing a stressful situation.  But laughing and being around light-hearted people can make your daily experience so much better.

Of course, that means that you have to be strategic regarding with whom you spend your time.  As we all know, there are some people who are negative and critical.  And if you are facing a health issue, it’s important that you keep those people at a distance. 

I’ll concede that in a perfect world, we would be kind and try to help every disgruntled person in our lives.  But when you are facing an illness, maintaining your joie de vivre is far more important than helping grouchy people.  Your job is to keep your spirits high and to enjoy your day.

When managing an illness, you want to surround yourself with people who have positive, uplifting attitudes.  Realize that positivity is infectious!  The more time you spend with happy, easy-going people, the happier you will be. 

As a result, if you are facing an illness, be sure to surround yourself with the right kind of people.  Then let the happy, positive energy of others uplift you!

Be a Source of Support to Others

It may seem counterintuitive, but the best thing that you can do when dealing with a serious illness, or any other life challenge, is to be a source of support to others.  What you may not realize is that your illness places you in a unique position to inspire others.

We all know that it’s hard to take advice or encouragement from someone with a seemingly perfect life.  But when someone says, “I’m going through challenges in my life, and this is how I handle them,” that is powerful.  So, if you are facing a serious illness, realize that you have inspiring advice to offer to others! 

For example, I once worked for a woman who had been diagnosed with Lupus.  She very often would speak about how she positively handled her diagnosis and illness.  Her story was inspiring in no small part because of the challenges she’d had to overcome.

In addition, helping others is empowering.  When we help others, we remind ourselves that we have something very important to offer the world.  That reminder is good for our confidence and self-esteem.  For instance, I love helping my husband and my daughter.  I enjoy being good and generous toward them.  It makes me happy to know that I’m able to do things to bring them happiness, support or comfort. 

So, don’t think that illness makes you unable to help and inspire others.  It’s just the opposite.  People want to learn from your example.  They want to be inspired by your approach to life.  And the more you help and inspire others, the happier you’ll feel about yourself and your life.

Creating a happy life while facing a serious illness is doable.  It simply requires you to be very intentional about how you approach each day.  Consider following the approaches above and create the happy life you are seeking.  More importantly if you have suggestions for other readers, please offer them in the comment section below.  There are other people who need your wise advice! (To read about effective ways to manage and reduce stress, click here.)