Our world feels chaotic these days. Within the span of three weeks, we’ve been overtaken by a highly contagious virus. This has led to quarantines, a lack of staple items in our grocery stores, and possibly loves ones who are ill. Admittedly, the speed with which our lives have changed is disconcerting. Being at peace in the midst of all this change can be challenging.
Certainly, life experience plays a part in how well we adapt. Every time I ask my mother if she is doing well being confined at home, she tells me, “My goodness, this is easy compared to life on the farm!” And then she regales me with how, back in the day, they used newspapers for toilet paper and often didn’t have fresh fruits and vegetables in the winter (only canned).
My daughter is equally content. She is 18-years-old and in her senior year of high school. While many of her peers are complaining about the possibility of missing their proms and not having a formal graduation, she is unperturbed. She is happy to be at home, relaxing before she heads off to college in the fall. Like most teenagers, she is enjoying getting extra sleep and doing her schoolwork at a leisurely pace.
The funny thing is that both my mother and my daughter are “at risk” individuals for the virus. My mother is elderly, and my daughter is asthmatic. They both could be spending their time fretting about the virus, and worried about whether they might get it. But they aren’t. They are following the rules, staying home, and riding this situation out – peacefully and prudently.
However, for most people, being at peace in these circumstances is challenging. The challenge is that the coronavirus pandemic is a situation that is outside of our control. And being at peace with situations that are outside of our control is hard.
Nevertheless, even when life is outside of our control, as it is now, we can find ways to be at peace. Below are some ways to remain content, even when our lives are anything but peaceful.
Know That This Too Shall Pass
Many years ago, I went through a period when I was under a great deal of personal stress. In addition to this stress, I had a job with a high level of responsibility and a child to take care of. My plate was full, and I felt overwhelmed.
Around this time, an aunt called me to check in on me. After I spilled out all my concerns to her, she said one simple thing to me, “This too shall pass.” She said that life changes and explained that what I was concerned about today, likely would not be a problem in 6 months. She was right.
Life changes. Situations evolve. For instance, at this time next year, we will not be quarantined. We will be able to go to the movies, out to dinner and to church on a Sunday morning. This pandemic will not last forever. We just have to remember that like all things, this too shall pass.
Do What You Can
There is a great saying that I follow in times of stress: “When you don’t know what to do, do what you know.” Wise words.
For example, normally I sleep straight through the night. But like most people, I have a lot on my mind these days. So, last night, I woke up at 3 a.m. and couldn’t get back to sleep. However, instead of lying in bed feeling aggravated, I got up and did some work. Now, that isn’t ideal. I am not a night owl. But instead being frustrated by the fact that I couldn’t sleep, I got up and did what I know – work.
I’ve often done this when parts of my life were a mess. If I can’t figure out how to solve a problem, I’ll do something that I know how to do with ease. For instance, if I am facing an issue that seems unsolvable, I’ll do a simple task, like clean out a closet or organize files. In that way, I can feel productive and successful. I won’t waste my time trying to figure out a solution to my problem in that moment. Instead, I’ll set it aside.
By setting aside the troubling issue, I give my mind a break from the problem. Doing something I know how to do well clears my head. Then later, when I return to the issue, a proper solution has come to me. In that way, I am able to keep my peace while I figure out what to do.
Conduct Yourself in A Way That Is True to Your Values
So much of life is outside of our control. We can’t control what other people do or say. The weather, illness, and pandemics are some of the many things outside of our control.
During times that seem out of control, all we can control is ourselves. Our behavior is the one thing we can control. We can control what we do and say. Being kind, patient and gentle with others are all choices that we can make. We can choose to be mature.
By choosing to act in a way that is true to our values, we can be at peace with ourselves. That is because at the end of the day, what really matter is not how other people have treated us. Rather, what matters is whether we are proud of the way we have conducted ourselves.
Ultimately, the one question that we will ask ourselves at the end of our lives is this: Did I behave during my life in a way that now, looking back, I am proud of?
I ask myself that question a lot. Most of the time, my answer is “Yes.” Even when life has been falling apart around me, or other people have been awful, I always have done my best to be consistently kind. I have bit my tongue on more occasions than I can count to avoid hurting the feelings of others – even when they were unkind to me. I’ve tried to turn the other cheek. And I’ve tried to take the high road.
Now, have I always been successful at being true to my values? No. Admittedly, I can be an impatient, judgmental sort of person. Those are my areas of weakness. But I do try to overcome them, so that most of the time, I can be proud of the way that I operate.
Being at peace when life around us is chaotic and unpredictable, as it is these days, is hard. Having an unshakeable inner peace takes effort. However, if you follow the approaches above, you will find that you can be at peace even in these uncertain times.
To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.Ecclesiastes 3:1 The hardest part Read more
There are times in life when our circumstances can prevent us from being relaxed and happy. Dramatic changes like a Read more
When we are young, we seek many things in life. Adventure. Professional success. Romance. But as we get older, and Read more
There is always the potential for stress in our lives. Sometimes that stress is created by others. Sometimes we create Read more
The holidays can be difficult for many adults. That is because we have an idealized view of what Christmas and Read more
Achieving inner peace is challenging. It's not something that comes naturally to us. The human mind searches for things that Read more
Recently a friend of mine turned 50. When I asked him what he wanted for his birthday, he said, “Peace.” Read more
“It ain’t over till it’s over” – Yogi Berra Yogi Berra made the above comment during the 1973 National League Read more
