We all want to be mentally strong. We each want to be able to successfully face the inevitable challenges of life and not break under the stress. But realize that none of us are born being mentally strong. Rather, mental strength is a muscle that we develop over time with good habits.
Below are the good habits to develop so that you can become mentally stronger. Follow them and see your mental strength and happiness increase!
1. To Develop Your Mental Strength, Don’t Dwell on the Past
Many people are obsessed with the unfortunate events from their past. They fret about things that happened one year ago. Some people even dwell on events that occurred over a decade ago. They live each day as if their past was part of their present.
The problem is that when you obsess about the bad things that happened in your past, you deplete your mental energy today. Realize that your past is just that – your past. There is nothing that you can do to change it. It’s over and done with. So, how does it serve you to continue to think about it?
Don’t allow your sadness and regrets over your past to burden your present. Let it go. Get on with your life. And keep yourself mentally strong by enjoying the blessings of the present.
2. Embrace Change
Most folks don’t enjoy change. That is why we stay in bad marriages and unfulfilling jobs. It’s just easier to stick with what we know.
But our bad marriages, jobs and other unfortunate circumstances deplete our mental strength. They make us tired, edgy and frustrated.
Mentally strong people know that they need to embrace change in order to improve their lives. So, they are the ones who will end a bad marriage and leave an unfulfilling job. They’ll readily change their circumstances so that they can be happy and mentally healthy.
3. Work on Controlling Yourself, Not Other People
One way in which we mentally exhaust ourselves is by trying to control other people. Realize that you can’t control other people. Nor can you control the economy or the weather. So many things in life are simply outside of our control.
Mentally strong people know that the only thing they can control is themselves. So, they work at being the best person that they can be. They work at living up to their own morals and ethics, and they don’t worry about what other people are doing. Their sole focus is on improving themselves.
Realize that when take your focus off of others and instead put it where it belongs – on yourself – you stop allowing others to sap your energy. Instead, you energize yourself with the rewards that come from working at being the best person that you can be!
4. Be Kind in All Circumstances
Arguing and being mean takes a toll on our mental health. After all, conflict is stressful. Mentally strong people know this fact, and as a result, they choose to be kind – even when they don’t feel like it.
Realize that we can all run around telling off folks who we think have slighted us. But that kind of angry, negative behavior only wears down our mental strength.
So, if you want to be mentally strong, choose to take the high road at all times. Don’t worry about proving a point or being “right.” Instead, make your mental health your top priority. Choose to be peaceful and learn to be kind at all times.
5. Learn to Take “Calculated” Risks
To build up your mental strength, it is important to learn how to take risks. Whenever we take risks and succeed, that builds up our confidence.
The key, however, is to take calculated risks. When you take a risk, you shouldn’t just jump off the cliff without thinking about the consequences. Instead, you should assess all the angles. Think about the pros and cons of every course of action. And then, once you’ve decided that the risk is worth it, have the courage to take that risk. If you assess your risks properly, most of the time, you’ll come out successfully at the other end.
Whenever we succeed after taking a risk, we develop both our confidence. And that confidence boosts our mental strength like nothing else.
6. Mentally Strong People Celebrate the Success of Others
There are few things that sap our mental strength like envy. When we are envious of others, it is because we feel inferior. And those feelings of inferiority are not good for our mental health.
To combat those feelings, you need to work at celebrating the successes of others. For example, if your friend gets a promotion, you need to say to yourself, “I’m so glad that Jane got that promotion! I am happy in my job too and am working to succeed. Isn’t it great that we are both doing so well!”
By celebrating the successes of others, you stop those feelings of envy dead in their tracks. And those positive feelings of goodwill will bolster your mental strength!
7. Be Independent (Don’t Feel Like the World Owes You)
There are a lot of people who feel like the world owes them something. Their parents owe them money. Society owes them a job.
Let me be clear: Once you turn 18, no one owes you anything. Before you turn 18, your parents and society generally are obliged to take care of all your needs. After 18, if anyone does anything for you, it is a gift. Treat it as such, and be grateful.
Mentally strong people don’t go through life wondering why folks aren’t doing more for them. They are independent. They give more than they receive in their relationships.
So, to be mentally strong, be independent. Be the kind of person who helps others. Don’t be the person who always has their hand out.
8. To Be Mentally Strong, Don’t Engage in Self-Pity
Certain people go through life hosting an on-going pity party. And they invite lots of people to attend. They then tell their attendees about all the horrible things that have happened to them. For example, they had a disappointing upbringing. Or, their parents were imperfect people. Perhaps they had a bad marriage.
Here is the problem with pity parties: No one really wants to attend. And if you do get some attendees, they are just being polite.
Mentally strong people realize that everyone has grievances, and everyone has had unfortunate life experiences. No one has had a perfect life. So, mentally strong people instead choose to live in the present. And if they have past experiences that they need to work through, they do that with a professional, like a psychologist.
So, don’t host pity parties about your past. Be mentally strong and live in the present. And make your present the best present possible.
9. Don’t Shy Away from Responsibilities
Some folks don’t like to take on responsibility. They prefer to live in a perpetual state of infancy. They resist making their beds in the morning. Their homes and finances are a mess. And they continually ask for help, rather than helping others.
By contrast, mentally strong people attack life head on. They don’t shy away from responsibilities. Instead, they embrace them! They are in charge of their lives, their homes and their bills. In fact, they are the ones who everyone goes to when they have a problem.
So, increase your mental strength by living responsibly and by successfully managing yourself, your finances and your surroundings. When you do so, you will feel more confident. And that feels good!
10. To be Mentally Strong, Stop the People Pleasing Habit
One of the most important lessons in life you can learn is this: You simply cannot please everyone. Anytime you please one person, another person is going to feel slighted or upset by what you have done. Or you may please someone and then regret that you did so!
Mentally strong people know that there is no way to please everyone all the time. As a result, they focus on simply pleasing themselves. Now realize that pleasing yourself doesn’t mean going through life living selfishly and doing nothing for others. Rather, it means that you live according to your own ethics and values.
So, your ethics and values may call for you to serve the poor. Or you may be called to save the environment. Or your values may call you to be good to your family.
So, don’t worry about pleasing others. Instead, be mentally strong and live a life in which you focus solely on doing those things that align with your values.
11. Learn to be Patient (Don’t Expect Immediate Results)
We live in a world in which instant gratification is the norm. Amazon delivers our orders the next day. We can order our groceries or a meal online and have it delivered within the hour. If I have a question, I likely can get it answered within seconds on the Internet.
So, we don’t have a lot of practice in being patient. But mentally strong people are good at being patient. They understand that not all good things in life happen immediately. Instead, they know that big goals take time to accomplish. Difficult problems take time to resolve. And they don’t fall apart if certain things in life don’t happen immediately.
So, to be mentally strong, learn to be patient! Don’t expect or demand instant gratification or solutions in life. Instead, learn how to wait with a good attitude.
We all want to be mentally strong in life. It feels good to be able to successfully deal with whatever comes our way. So, consider developing the habits above and become the mentally strong person that you were meant to be!
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