When we are young, we seek many things in life. Adventure. Professional success. Romance. But as we get older, and life becomes more complicated, most of us just crave one thing – peace. By the time we reach an age of maturity, most of us simply are seeking a peaceful life.
We want peace of mind. We want peaceful relationships. We want our homes to be a peaceful sanctuary away from the world.
The good news is that a peaceful life isn’t something that is available only to the lucky or the rich. It is available to all of us. We simply have to make good choices with how we live our lives.
Below are some choices that you can make to create a peaceful life. Consider making these choices in your own life and watch your peace increase!
1. Choose Not to Argue
Most of us can be peaceful about things that we don’t care about. But how often do we choose to argue about those things that are important to us? Too often!
For instance, friends and families argue about politics and religion. Couples argue about how to spend their money and where to live. Parents argue with their children about what choices they should make in life. These are not unimportant topics.
However, if you want to have a peaceful life, you have to choose not to argue. You have to choose not to argue, even if the issue is really important to you. You have to choose not to argue, even if you really believe that the other person is dead wrong.
Why? Because arguing is a waste of time. If you argue and try to bully other people into seeing the world your way, you’ll only end up irritating them. You won’t change anyone’s mind by arguing. So, instead, choose to be peaceful and stop getting on everyone’s nerves.
2. Choose to Ignore Bad Behavior
Not one of us acts perfectly all the time. We all, on occasion, aggravate other people.
As a result, if you want to have peaceful relationships, you sometimes have to ignore the crummy behavior of others. For example, if your child doesn’t make their bed once in a while, just sigh and make it for them. Be happy that their bed gets made most of the time. If your spouse comes home from work in a grouchy mood once in a while, let it go. Leave him or her alone for the evening to relax and unwind.
We all have “off” days. If you lose your peace simply because one of your family members is having an off day, your household will be fraught with tension. Better to just ignore folks when they aren’t doing or feeling their best.
Of course, there are behaviors we can’t ignore. You can’t ignore a child’s disrespectful behavior. That has to be corrected. And you can’t ignore it if your spouse is chronically sullen and moody, has affairs, or gives you the silent treatment. Those are abusive behaviors that cannot be tolerated.
But for the most part, we need to turn a blind eye to other people’s sometimes unsavory behavior. If their bad behavior isn’t the norm, just ignore it. Appreciate them for who they are most of the time – loving, kind and pleasant people.
3. To Have A Peaceful Life, Choose to Turn Off Your Electronics
The Internet and television bombard us with negative information all day long. The news typically is not positive. Our politicians are uninspiring and conflict-oriented. Many of our television shows and movies have violent content. None of that is going to bring you peace of mind.
While I’m not suggesting that you isolate yourself on a hilltop with no electricity, you do need to take a hiatus each day from your screens. Put your phone away for 10 minutes and listen to beautiful music. Read a book (the paper kind!) with a positive message. Sit quietly with a cup of tea, and just relax for a certain amount of time every afternoon.
We aren’t obliged to be constantly available electronically. We don’t have to immediately respond to texts (except from our children) or emails. And with all due respect to Twitter, we don’t need to know every bit of news as it is happening. This abundance of information isn’t liberating. Rather, it is a burden because it is just too much.
Take charge of your life and give yourself screen-free time regularly throughout the day. That will allow you to quiet your mind and feel more at peace.
4. Choose to Spend Part of Each Day Doing Practical Tasks
Over the years, I’ve gotten to know people who were depressed or dissatisfied with their lives. And each of these people had one thing in common: They didn’t do real-life tasks. Their basic needs (food, laundry, cleaning) were taken care of by others.
A lifestyle in which you are constantly being served leads to depression. The most depressed people I’ve ever known didn’t clean their own bathrooms, cook their own food or do their own laundry. So, they didn’t have the opportunity to engage in what I call “mind-clearing” tasks.
To have a peaceful mind, you need to spend a part of each day clearing your mind by doing repetitive, mundane tasks. When we do so, it gives our brains a break from the stress that we may be facing. For instance, folding laundry is a meditative practice. When we fold laundry, we can be fully in the moment. We can fold a shirt or a pair of pants, and focus solely on that task. And in doing so, we can give our minds a break from any stresses that may be happening in our lives.
5. Choose to Live Responsibly
It is hard to have peace of mind when you can’t pay your bills. My husband and I work very hard to make sure that we are financially secure. As a result, we have peace of mind. We don’t worry if a big bill comes up because we have savings to cover any unexpected issues.
But my husband and I live responsibly. We live below our means, which isn’t always glamorous. For example, while we enjoy life, we also cook most meals at home. And we only shop for necessity, not as entertainment.
In addition to having financial security, in order to have a peaceful life, you need to live in a well-organized and tidy home. Your home needs to be a calm place to live. It is not possible to relax if your house is a mess.
So, you need to be responsible about cleaning your home. Make sure to do your dishes every evening. Tidy up at the end of the day. Make your beds every morning. If you do so, your home will be a serene and peaceful place in which to live.
Achieving a peaceful life doesn’t just happen. It is the result of making certain choices that allow you to have peaceful relationships and a peaceful environment in which to live. Try following the suggestions above. If you apply even one of them in your daily life, you will find that your life will become more peaceful than ever before. (To read more about creating a peaceful life, click here.) (To read about the power of taking responsibility, click here.)
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