Most of us don’t believe that we are here by chance. Instead, we each believe that there is a reason for our existence. We believe that there is a purpose for our lives. And we spend a lot of time trying to figure out what our particular life purpose is.
The challenge is that for human beings, our life purpose isn’t self-evident. We are complex creatures. We aren’t inanimate objects whose purpose can be easily identified. For example, if you looked at my coffee mug, you immediately would think, “The purpose of that mug is to hold hot beverages.” And you would be right.
However, if you look at me, without knowing anything about me, you can’t know what my purpose is. The only information you could glean by looking at me is that I am female and middle-aged. That is about it. And you can’t discern my life purpose from those two small pieces of information.
It would be nice if our life purpose was obvious. It would be great if you could simply look at someone and know his or her purpose, like my coffee mug. Unfortunately, life isn’t that simple. Instead, our purpose is something that each of us has to figure out.
Fortunately, that isn’t an impossible task. Figuring out your life purpose simply takes some work and reflection. But it is worth the effort! When you do figure it out, your life will take shape. You days will not seem aimless. Knowing your life purpose will give you a direction and meaning that your life currently doesn’t have.
Below are five simple steps that you can take to discern your purpose in life. Follow these steps and see how your life can change for the better.
Step One – Discover Your Natural Talents
We all are better at some things than others. For instance, I am far better at playing my flute than I am at playing softball. I am much better at housekeeping than I am at gardening. No one does every task equally well. We each have certain skills that come naturally to us.
If you want to discover your life purpose, the first step is to figure out what your natural talents are. That is because your life purpose in some way will capitalize on those talents.
If you want a clue as to what your natural talents are, ask yourself this question: What can I do easily that is difficult for others? For example, I have a friend who sews quilts that are works of art. I couldn’t begin to do what she does with a sewing machine. Sewing is her natural talent. And she is naturally artistic. These are talents that she possesses which other people don’t have.
Once you have identified your natural talent (or talents), you then have a good starting point to figure out your purpose. That is because your life purpose somehow will involve your natural skills and talents. As a result, when you are accomplishing your life purpose, you will be in the zone. It will feel very right. That is why it is so important in this process to first identify your natural talents.
Step Two – Figure out Where Your Natural Interests Lie
If you walked into Barnes & Noble, what section would you head to first? For me, I would head to personal development. I love reading books about how to better oneself. The process of how to become a better person, a better leader – a better anything – fascinates me. As a result, once I figured out that my life purpose was to be a writer, not surprisingly, I fell into the personal development genre.
What fascinates you? What can you read about for hours without getting bored? Your natural interests are a clue as to what your life purpose is. Your life was designed for a certain purpose, and you naturally will gravitate toward that purpose.
The challenge in life is that we often don’t know our own interests. When we are small, our parents (and maybe our siblings) dictate our activities. As we get older, in order to form friendships, we may adopt our friends’ interests. And when we get married, we may adopt some of our spouse’s interests, so we have “shared interests” with our spouse.
But those are all distractions from getting to know ourselves and our true interests. They are a distraction from the real work that we need to do to discover our life purpose. So, get to know yourself! Figure out what it is that you really enjoy. Figure out what interests you, without all the noise of the outside world competing for your attention.
Step Three – Whose Life Do You Admire?
A good way to discern your life purpose is to think about someone whose life you truly admire. Who would you want to be, even for a day?
There are lots of very successful, impressive people whose lives you would not want to have. For instance, while you might think that it would be great to be a professional athlete, their lives are grueling. They have workout regimes that push their bodies to the limit. They have to carefully monitor everything that they eat. If you are unwilling to make those kinds of sacrifices, then being a professional athlete is not your life purpose.
Alternatively, you may look at someone and say, “Now, that is my dream life.” For instance, you may look at the Barefoot Contessa and think, “I would love to have her life. I would love to spend my days creating new recipes and writing cookbooks.” If you look at someone and think, “Wow, I’d like to be that person, for even just a day,” then you have a clue as to what your life purpose would be.
So, consider all the people that you admire. Think realistically about what their typical day might look like. If their life seems amazing to you, then you are beginning to hone in on what may be the purpose for your life.
Step Four – Seek Advice from Someone You Trust
Identify a person who truly wants you to be happy and successful. Find someone who sees the best in you. Then talk to that person about your quest to find your life purpose. It helps to get solid feedback from others as to what they believe would be a good fit for your life.
However, pick your advisor carefully. Your parents love you, but their advice may be wrapped up in their own concerns. For instance, if your parents are very traditional, they may discourage a life purpose that is unusual, such as devoting your life to the arts or music. If they are money-focused, they may discourage you from pursuing a meaningful but low paying career.
And your friends may be equally unhelpful. Unfortunately, people can be very competitive. Your friends may not want you to eclipse them. So, they may discourage you from a life path for no other reason than that they don’t want you to be more successful than they are.
So, you have to get help from someone you truly trust. You need advice from someone who just wants the best for you. Ask that person what they consider to be your best qualities. Ask that person for their ideas as to what might be your life purpose.
And if you can’t find a trustworthy friend or family member to help you, hire a life coach. That money will be well-spent if that coach can help you identify your purpose in life.
Step Five – Try Stuff Out
Some people in this world, from a very young age, know what they are meant to do with their lives. For the rest of us, we have to figure it out. And sometimes we have to do so by trial and error.
For instance, I didn’t start out as a writer. I am a lawyer by trade. But about 15 years into my legal career, I decided that I wanted to give writing a try. And I’ve been writing ever since. I’ve tried different genres, and ultimately, I settled into personal development. But it has been a long, meandering road to get here.
Of course, it would have been a lot easier if I had started out with an undergraduate degree in English and began writing in earnest at 22. However, life didn’t work that way for me. I suspect it doesn’t work that way for most folks. Instead, we live life by trial and error until we fall into something that fits.
So, don’t be afraid to try out different life purposes. See what works and what doesn’t. Pretty soon, you’ll find a place where your talents, interests and passions all come together. Then, before you know it, you’ll realize that you have found your life purpose.
Figuring out your life purpose is important. When you do, your life will make a lot more sense. It will be easier to make decisions. And when you are accomplishing your purpose, your life will just flow. So, follow the steps above. Discover your life purpose and create a great life. (To read about focusing on your purpose for today, click here.)
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