The Power of Changing Your Perspective

The challenges that we face in life are either overwhelming or manageable based on our perspective. Time and time again, I’ve found that when facing a problem, if I simply change my perspective, I have greater clarity regarding the situation and am more capable of dealing with it. That is the power of changing your perspective.

For example, many years ago, my husband had a surgery which went awry. Following the surgery, for five days, he was on life support. Initially, it was unclear whether he would survive.

My initial reaction was to be overwhelmed. My perspective was that I could not handle the situation. And then my pastor simply said to me, “Meerabelle, trust God.” He didn’t say everything would turn out well. None of us knew what was going to happen. Instead, he told me to trust that God in this situation.

So, I did exactly that. I decided to trust God. That night, I went home from the hospital, got a shower and a good night’s sleep. The next day, I returned to the hospital confident, in control of myself, and able to make calm medical decisions for my husband.

My change in perspective went from, “I cannot handle this situation,” to “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” The situation had not changed. My husband was still on life support. Rather, my perspective changed, and that made all the difference for me.

Realize that our perspective affects everything in our lives from how we relate to other people to how we manage life’s most challenging situations. That is why our happiness is dependent on how we view our life. It is dependent on our perspective.

Below are some ways to change your perspective so that you can be happier and more confident.

Change Your Perspective on Other People

Often, we have relationship problems because our expectations of others are inappropriate. For example, I have a friend who has been home alone with her children these days due to the pandemic restrictions. Her husband has a demanding job and is out of the house quite a bit. She is bored, lonely for adult company, and is unhappy. And she has decided that her unhappiness is due to her marriage.

My friend’s problem is not her marriage. Her problem is her perspective. Her husband is busy working. She cannot expect him to keep her happy and fulfilled. He is busy. More importantly, making herself happy is her job.

To be clear, a bad marriage doesn’t occur when someone fails to make you happy. Making yourself happy is your job. Your marriage is bad when your spouse makes you miserable. The relationship is bad when you realize that without your spouse in your life, you would be happy.

So, if you want to be happy, have the right perspective on what you expect from other people. You can expect people to be respectful, kind and caring toward you. You can expect people to not behave in a manner that is mean, disrespectful or bullying. But don’t expect other people to make you happy because that is solely your job.

Have A Realistic Perspective About Your Employment

Very often people have an unrealistic perspective regarding their employment. Specifically, they view their employer and colleagues as “family.” And that perspective leads to disappointment.

Part of the problem is that employers like to inspire their employees’ loyalty. So, they refer to the people you work with as your “team” or “family.” That is because they want you to work hard and stay at your job – until they no longer wish to employ you.

The right perspective on any job is this: Your job is your way to make money and pay your bills. Period. Of course, as a matter of self-respect, you should do your job well and to the best of your ability. And to be a moral person, you should treat every person you work with and every customer or client that you serve with the utmost kindness and respect.

But realize that your colleagues and supervisors are neither your team nor your family. I am sure that they care about you as a human being. But if your employer downsizes, they will fire you without hesitation. Your family can’t do that.

So, if you are unhappy with your job, change your perspective on it. Enjoy your job because the work is satisfying. Appreciate your colleagues because they are great people. But don’t love your employer because your employer will not love you back.

Changing Your Perspective on Life’s Disappointments

No one goes through life unscathed. Every one of us will face disappointment in life. The difference between people who rebound from disappointment and people who don’t is their perspective.

I am not a pessimist, but I by no means expect life to go perfectly. Some days things go smoothly. On other days, life can be frustrating. People don’t always act the way they should. And sometimes there are bumps in the road and bad luck!

But I don’t fall apart when things don’t go according to plan. My perspective is that bumps in the road of life are inevitable. They just need to be handled. For example, during the 2010 recession, I lost my job. I will admit that I cried after my employer told me! I loved my job at the time. As a result, my initial perspective was one of disappointment.

But after a day or two, I rallied. I admitted to myself that it was reasonable for them to let me go, given the economic climate. I simply was not a necessary employee. So, I dusted off my resume and aggressively looked for a new job. I changed my perspective and didn’t stay in the world of disappointment.

So, the key to being resilient is to have the perspective that life is by its nature imperfect. Things don’t always go according to plan. So, the only way to succeed is to accept that fact, and be ready to rebound no matter what life throws at you.

If you are facing a challenge or disappointment, try changing your perspective on the situation. You will be surprised at how powerful that can be. By simply looking at a situation in a new way, you can be happier and more confident to face whatever life has thrown at you. (To read about dealing with change, click here.)