How to Turn a Setback into a Breakthrough in 4 Simple Steps

When we face setbacks in life, it’s understandably disappointing.  After all, it’s frustrating when things don’t work out in the way that we’d hoped.  But what I’ve observed is that our setbacks often are just stepping stones along the path to a major breakthrough.  The key is knowing how to transform your setbacks into a breakthrough.

Realize that the only real problem with any setback is this: Setbacks can lead us to give up.  We think, “Well, if I couldn’t overcome this obstacle, then it just wasn’t meant to be.”  Unfortunately, that’s how the most folks view setbacks.  They view them as a sign that they should just give up.  And that’s why most people don’t reach their full potential.

The reality is that if you want to reach your full potential, you have to persist.  You can’t allow setbacks to stop you from pursuing your goals.

Now, I understand that setbacks, a.k.a. failures, are discouraging.  It’s discouraging to not get the job that you applied for.  Or to get divorced.  Or to not get into the college of your dreams.  It’s discouraging to have your business fail.  Or to lose your job.  Setbacks are by their very nature discouraging experiences!

But the only way to achieve your full potential is to become adept at transforming your setbacks into breakthroughs.

Below are 4 simple steps that you can take to turn your setback into a breakthrough.  Follow these steps, and turn any setback into a springboard to success.

Step 1. Analyze the Root Cause of the Setback

Whenever you experience a setback or failure, it helps to understand “why.”  “Why did I have this setback?” So, you first need to understand the external forces that caused the setback.  But then, you need to figure out your own role in creating the setback.

Understanding your own role in any setback takes humility.  Typically, we’d much rather blame others when we’ve had a setback.  Now, I’ll concede that sometimes other people are at fault!  But if you want to have success after a setback, you also have to take a hard look at your own behavior.  You have to figure out where you’ve erred.

For example, if you’ve ever been divorced, you’ll know that your first instinct is to say, “Well, he/she was impossible!  There was no way that the marriage could last.”  That may be true.  But you chose to marry someone who had a difficult personality or poor behavior.  So, the question you have to ask yourself is, “Why?”

Answering that question takes some humility.  You have to acknowledge that, in some respect, you exercised flawed judgment when you chose to marry that person.  That’s on you. 

The same analysis can be applied to any setback or failure.  You have to ask yourself, “What was my role in this setback?  Was my judgment flawed?  Did I say or do something that led to this failure?” 

If you go through the mental exercise of evaluating your role in any setback or failure, not only will you grow in humility, but you also will grow in wisdom.  If you know why you made mistakes in the past, you’ll be better able to avoid making those same mistakes in the future.  And that’s the way to get yourself on the path from a setback to a breakthrough.

Step 2. Commit to the Journey

You won’t achieve breakthroughs if setbacks cause you to give up.  You have to be the kind of person who looks failure straight in the face and says, “That’s OK, Failure.  You can’t stop me.  I’m going to keep trying.”

I’ll concede that’s difficult.  It’s difficult to pick yourself up after a setback and keep working toward your goal.  What I’ve learned over the years is that you can keep working toward any goal, no matter how many setbacks you face, if you commit yourself to the journey. 

What do I mean by that?  Well, that means that when striving toward a goal, your goal should be something that’s out there, on the horizon.  You can see it.  You’re moving toward it.  But you aren’t expecting to get there today.  That’s because you’re still on your journey.  And during your journey, your only job is to do something each day that is enjoyable, and which gets you a little bit closer to that goal.

For example, I love studying languages.  I currently am studying both French and Spanish.  Now, my goal is to someday be a fluent speaker of both languages.  But that takes a long time!  You simply can’t achieve fluency in any language overnight.  That’s a goal that will take years (if not decades) to achieve. 

But I’m not upset because I’m not currently fluent in French or Spanish.  Rather, I’m enjoying the language learning journey.  As a result, I don’t get upset if I have setbacks in my language learning and don’t advance as quickly as I’d like to. That’s because I find the language learning journey to be fun! 

So, don’t get frustrated by setbacks.  Setbacks are just part of the journey.  Instead, learn to enjoy the journey as you work toward your goal.  Have fun with it!  If you do so, you’ll be one of the few people in this world who actually reaches their full potential.

Step 3. Talk about Your Setback with a Trusted Friend

We all need confidants in life.  We all need someone with whom we can be honest, and from whom we can get wise feedback.

When I see people make mistakes in their careers and relationships, what I find is that those folks invariably don’t have a wise, trusted confidant.  They don’t have someone with whom they can be honest, and from whom they can receive good advice.  So, they suffer one setback after another because they keep making the same mistakes over and over again.

I am blessed to have three trusted advisors in my life: My husband, my daughter, and a life-long friend who I’ve known since high school.  I seek their advice on all matters.  And because I’ve been willing to be honest and vulnerable with them and tell them when I’ve failed, over the years, I’ve been able to get great advice from them.  And that advice has helped me to achieve my goals and become a more successful human being.

So, if you are seeking to turn your setback into a breakthrough, talk about your setback with a trusted friend.  Choose someone who is really in your corner, and who wants you to succeed in life.  Chances are, that person will offer you a wise perspective that you may not have considered before, and that advice will propel you along your path to success.

Step 4. Develop a Plan to Move Forward

Once you’ve gotten over the disappointment of having had a setback, and you’ve figured out why the setback occurred, it’s time to develop a plan to move forward.  Moving forward is tough!  It means that you have set your ego aside, and try again.

The challenge is that trying again after a setback is a very public activity.  And sadly, some folks don’t keep trying because they’re so worried about what other people think of them. They’re concerned about having other people see them fail yet another time. If you have that issue, this is my advice: Stop it.  Stop worrying about what other people think of you.  It’s a massive waste of time. 

The people who ultimately succeed in life are those who aren’t worried about the opinions of others.  Instead, they run their own race.  They put on their blinders and are unconcerned about what other folks think of them, or what other folks are doing.  Instead, they’re simply concerned about accomplishing their own goals.

When you put on your blinders, that allows you to keep getting up after every setback.  I, myself, have been knocked down in life more times than I can count.  I’ve faced one obstacle after another.  And the reason that I keep getting back up after every failure and setback is that I don’t concern myself with what other people think.  I have a very clear idea of what I want my life to look like, and what I want to accomplish. 

My vision for my life is unique.  Your vision for your life should be unique as well.  It should look like no one else’s vision for their lives.  The good news is that once you figure out your unique vision for your life, then your setbacks lose their gravity.  They become just bumps on the road as you pursue your unique goals and create your amazing life.

If you are seeking to achieve a breakthrough after a setback (or a couple of setbacks), consider following the steps above.  By learning from your setbacks and then continuing to move forward, you can transform any setback into a stepping stone for future success! (To read about embracing failure on the path to success, click here.)