How to Believe in Yourself

Often in life, it isn’t a lack of talent or skills that prevents us from achieving our goals.  Rather, it is fear.  We mistakenly fear that we don’t have what it takes.   So, the first step in achieving anything in life is to first believe that you can do it.  It is critical to learn how to believe in yourself if you want to accomplish anything great in life.

I always am surprised by how many people don’t believe in themselves.  People who strike me as being reasonably talented and smart will admit that they don’t think that they are good enough.  If you feel that way, you need to stop that wrong-headed thinking today. 

Below are strategies so that you can learn how to believe in yourself.  Apply them in your life and see how much more you can accomplish, and how much happier you can be!

Start by Finding Things That You Like About Yourself

One reason why we don’t believe in ourselves is that we don’t appreciate our gifts and talents.  Instead, we engage in negative self-talk.  We may tell ourselves some of the following lies: “I’m not smart enough.” “I’m not pretty enough.”  “I’m not talented enough to accomplish my dreams.”

The best way to quit the negative self-talk habit is to regularly engage in positive self-talk.  One way is to note three things that you like about yourself every morning.  You may note something that you like about your appearance.  Or you may reflect on something that you did well recently.

Realize that there are lots of things that are great about you!  The problem is that you either forget about them, or don’t take time to recognize them.

Once you get in the habit of positive self-talk, the more confident you will feel.  And soon you will begin to believe in yourself and in your ability to accomplish any goal that you choose. 

Don’t Let Other People Define You

It is nice to receive compliments.  And it is terrible to be insulted.  And the key to believing in yourself is to not pay attention to either.

People who truly believe in themselves don’t rely on the opinions of others.  They aren’t waiting for a compliment to feel good about themselves.  And they don’t crumple when they get insulted.  Instead, they define their own self-worth.

So, if you want to start believing in yourself, don’t let other people define your value.  Don’t let other people dictate how you view yourself.  Instead, look in the mirror, and love the image that you see.  Consider your accomplishments, and feel proud.

In short, learn to define yourself.  If you do, the opinions of the world simply won’t matter.

Run Your Own Race

One reason why we stop believing in ourselves is that we compare ourselves to others.  And when we don’t have their same achievements, we conclude that we are failures. It is a silly way to look at life.

If you want to start believing in yourself, then run your own race.  Don’t look to your left or to your right to decide whether you are doing well in life.  That doesn’t make an ounce of sense. 

Realize that your peers don’t have the same gifts and talents as you.  You’ve been given a specific set of gifts and talents to accomplish your purpose on this earth.  You’ve been made perfectly for your mission.  So, believe in yourself and the qualities that you possess.

Let me put it this way:  If you purpose on earth is to be a car, don’t run around being sad because you aren’t a refrigerator.  I know that sounds crazy, but some people do exactly that. 

For example, when I was young, I had dreams of being an opera singer.  But unfortunately, I didn’t have the talent to do that as a career.  Now, I could go through life feeling badly about that fact.  I could compare myself to all my favorite opera singers, and I could feel like a failure.  But I don’t.  Instead, I am happy with the gifts and talents that I have.  I am happy to run my own race.

So, stop looking to your left and your right.  Stop the comparison game.  Instead, believe in yourself and appreciate the unique gifts and talents that you have been given.

Rest on Your Laurels

There is a very silly saying that goes, “Don’t rest on your laurels.”  Essentially, it means, “Don’t simply be satisfied with your past success, and do nothing to achieve success in the future.” 

I’ll give you some better advice.  Rest on Your Laurels.  Enjoy your past success!  Revel in it.  Feel good about the fact that at one time, you did something great.

There is nothing more stupid than feeling badly about yourself because you haven’t done something great recently.  So what?  Realize that there are seasons in our lives when we accomplish a lot.  And then there are seasons when, for very good reasons, we accomplish less.

For instance, when my daughter was small, I did not accomplish much professionally.  During that time in my life, I was focused on raising her.  That was my single most important job.  And I loved it!  As a young mother, professional accomplishment was irrelevant to me.  Rather, I cared about being a mom.  And that was the right attitude for that season of my life.

Of course, I’d had professional accomplishments from my pre-motherhood years.  And yes, I rested on those laurels!  I felt good about them.  They gave me confidence in my abilities.  And I didn’t need to keep striving professionally to still feel good about those accomplishments. 

So, rest on your laurels.  Feel great about your past accomplishments.  They are the best indicator that you have what it takes to accomplish great things in the future – when the time is right.

Do Small Things Well

One of the best ways to start believing in yourself is to first try to do small things well.  When you do something small successfully, then you build the confidence to accomplish bigger and bigger goals.

For example, let’s say that you don’t believe that you can lose weight.  Consider initially just making small changes to your habits.  Perhaps you might add 20 minutes of exercise to your daily routine.  Or, you could start each day with a healthier breakfast.  As you keep making small changes to your routine – and stick to those changes – you will start to believe that you have what it takes to lose those extra pounds.

That approach holds true for developing confidence in any area.  Start with small tasks first.  Do them successfully, and then keep building on to them with harder and harder tasks.  Soon, you truly will believe that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to!

Figure Out Your Life Purpose

There are many people who will tell you that life is random.  They’ll argue that no one has a special life purpose.  Those folks are wrong.

You aren’t here by accident.  Rather, you are here because you have a special purpose on this earth.  You have been placed on this earth for the purpose of making your part of the world a better, kinder, gentler and more decent place.  And you have been given the qualities and talents to accomplish that very purpose.

So, believing in yourself really means believing that you are here for a purpose.  And it means believing that you have everything you need to fulfill that purpose.  You just need to do it.

Consider using the approaches above to start believing in yourself.  Realize that you have what it takes to accomplish your goals and dreams.  Learn how to believe in yourself and see the great things that you can do with your life. (To read about how to discover your life purpose, click here.) (To read about focusing on your purpose for today, click here.)